I’m sitting in the dining room of the house I grew up in. My parents and sister are asleep, and I’m bundled in a fuzzy bathrobe, listening to my dog snoring, drinking Trader Joe’s peppermint tea, and rewriting my bucket list.
I’ve been staying up late recently, partly because of the jetlag but mostly because I’m seeking alone time. As it gets later and later, I feel more and more creative. My eyes start to droop, but my fingers move faster and faster across the keyboard. As my body and mind slowly go to sleep, my soul comes to life.
After 28 months of travel, it’s a huge relief to finally be home again. I’ve been dreaming about seeing these people – friends, family, and even the homeless people on State Street. Now that they are here next to me, its a relief – but it’s also not what I expected.
I feel pulled in many directions by many different people. My sister is only in town for 10 days so she is a priority, but there are also lots of friends to see and parties to attend. And when is the quiet time for myself? I have been doing yoga and making a green smoothie every morning, which is grounding, but it is not enough.
Now, in the dark hours of the night, when I am on the brink of sleep, I can tap into a part of my unconscious that is reserved for dreams and soul travel. It is the upper chakras, it is the throat, the third eye, and the crown. Something is speaking and it is not my mind.
Meanwhile, my bucket list is rational and linear. I have a plan, and I’m not afraid to achieve it. At the same time, I know that if I don’t accomplish every single item on the list, I will not be angry or sad. I will accept what is, no matter what. However, I know I have the power to do it. And I will.
I’m healing myself. By organizing my dreams, I am manifesting my future.
So take a look at my new bucket list, and let me know what you think.
Where Is Amber? 